Europe gives me the Fresh Meat Factor, but Asian correctness keeps my gut clenched. I long to be a shameless toy, but my mind fights back. You’ll see the struggle in the Petplay video with Pup Jati—I was stiff as a board. But that’s the point: trying, failing, and finally breaking free.
Hello Kinksters. ✨ Mark here! Ugh, guys. It’s time to dig a little deeper—and not just in the dungeon! 😉
You all know Spanking is my Main Kink and will always be my first love. But ever since I became an exchange student here in Europe, my horizon—and my list of preferences—has exploded.
I started exploring kinks back in Asia. You know that Spanking was clearly my first and deepest love. But eventually, I realized there was so much more excitement waiting for me. Out of curiosity for new taboos, Bondage was the first thing I added. But let me put it this way: it wasn’t easy. The scene is smaller, more discreet, and the ingrained Asian restraint is deeply rooted, making it complicated to discover new taboos.
Everything is easier here in Europe. It’s more open, more direct, and I can fully live out my Fresh Meat Factor. That, of course, gives me a lot of curious attention—it’s exciting, but sometimes it makes me a little unsure because I notice how differently I’m viewed.
In this new world, I ran into MasterMarc. Wow, when I saw his Dungeon, I was thrilled! I’ve visited him several times and keep meeting other fascinating kinksters, his slaves, and friends there. And you benefit from it, because it regularly generates photo and video material.
No, he’s not my Master, but more of a Mentor. And here’s the exciting part: He told me clearly that he sees a pronounced Sub side, but also a Dom side in me. My first reaction was an honest head shake, because I’d always seen myself only as a Sub! But he sees potential, not to top him, but his slaves. The mere thought of that responsibility and control is incredibly appealing and challenging, but also kind of scary.
It was a little odd at first to enter this space with a clear hierarchy. Although I’m used to discipline as an East Asian, I found it fascinating, to see how guys in this European world—marked by freedom and equality—voluntarily submit to this structure. It’s funny, but I understand and feel that deep need, too. But I quickly realized that while the hierarchy is present, it’s truly a space of deep friendship and huge trust.
The Inner Battle: Giving Up Control
These visits give me the freedom to explore new things and venture into things that aren’t (yet) mine. You heard the story about the Chastity—definitely a process, and I don’t know if I want more experience in that area. We’ll see.
In general, I still have to learn to surrender more, whether it’s to an activity or to a guy as a Sub. I notice I’m still inhibited. It’s this deep, inner need for security that makes it so hard for me to let go of control and the ingrained correctness, and to completely drop into being a shameless toy and fully enjoying it.
When my head screams, “Let go, this feels hot!” my gut holds tight to the Asian restraint practiced for years. You notice it with AssPlay too: even though I actually really like it, this mental barrier is often the most painful part. And you know yourself that a tense ass isn’t pleasant for the Top or for me as a Sub. But hey, it gets better with every visit!
Petplay Experiment with Pup Jati
That’s precisely why I’m grateful for this Safespace I found with MasterMarc. I recently had a lot of fun there with Pup Jati, his slave. We really tried a lot—from soft to hard, from cuddling to spanking. And since he’s a real fan of Petplay, I dared to put on a mask and a dog tail. Hehe.
If you watch this full video, you’ll immediately notice: I was stiff as a board! The Pup-Headspace is still foreign to me, and that shows. But that’s what it’s all about—trying, failing, learning, and growing.
You’re getting a little sneak peek of the struggle right here! If you want to see the whole story of me trying to be a shameless toy (and how I almost fail, haha!), just hit the link right next to this preview! I’m putting a lot of time and effort into sharing these adventures with you, so if you dig the content, consider supporting my journey! You can watch this video individually or become a supporter and get access to all my wild escapades with a single subscription. Every bit of support means the world to this little new Fresh Meat in Europe. Plus, you know, being a Biology student means I can really use the extra cash for my living in expensive Germany and, well, everything else! 😉
Phew, as you can see… a master isn’t made overnight! 🙈 I was super stiff and unsure at the start. But hey, that’s totally fine! The awesome support from MasterMarc 🙏 and the killer cuddles from Pup Jati 🤗 mega-motivated me to stick with it and keep going. 💪 And yeah, I gotta be honest: This kink exploration is HUGE FUN! 🎉 I’m excited to see what comes next. 😊
I’ll definitely write regularly here about kinks and my progress. But don’t look at it as a chronological diary: for certain activities, I want to live and process them again before adding my two cents in written form. The debriefing and self-reflection after the sessions are the most important part of my growth here.
What do you think about this insight into my Kink Beginnings? Do you share similar mental barriers? And because I’m so curious: I would be thrilled if you emailed me and told me how you got into the kink world! Watch the full Pup Play video now! 😉
